Managing expectations
Oct 9, 2018 22:40:17 GMT 9
Post by Jen on Oct 9, 2018 22:40:17 GMT 9
Lately I find myself having a really hard time not getting angry/frustrated when people interact with my daughter in the Majority Language (Spanish). I always wanted to have a bilingual/bi-cultural family and I love it, but recently I realized that acquiring a minority language doesn't happen magically (especially when you are the only source of exposure) and that has me freaked out.
Here is my story...
My daughter is 2 and we live in Chile. I am her only exposure to English. Her dad and half sister, who visits on the weekends, speak only Spanish. Her grandmother, who speaks only Spanish, takes care of her in the day. Everything is Spanish, except me.
I had no idea that I would have problems with language stuff. I thought it was like the movies and because I spoke to her she would naturally speak back to me in English.
I had a meltdown maybe a month ago when I realized how much her Spanish was progressing and her English not so much. I have made a bunch of changes like now allowing her to watch some types of videos when I am worn out from narrating everything we do, keeping her up later at night to have more time, getting my family to do short videos of the words we are working on, getting dad and sister to participate in English (it´s not that much, but every little bit helps), I am in the process of trying to make English-speaking friends here who want/need the same thing (I have met a couple of people and we have our first meetup soon). My mom is coming for three weeks and I will extend my visits to the US to have even more time, etc. Things have gotten better. She now has more words in English, she repeats me more often now. So I am a little better. Plus finding this site has been great. Knowing that this problem is common and giving me tools to deal with the situation. I am MUCH more aware of the work that is in front of me and I am totally up for it. The problem is...
How do I stop analyzing every interaction with her and that she has with others? I feel embarrassed to admit this, but I see myself getting angry with her grandmother and sister for interacting with her in Spanish. SOOOO WRONG. Plus, I don't enjoy my time with her as much as I could because I am obsessed with constantly talking and narrating everything. Gotta get my 30 hours and make 'em count!!!! This is a long term goal. I need to have patience, but I find it difficult.
Do others experience this or is it just me? How do you deal with these feelings?
Here is my story...
My daughter is 2 and we live in Chile. I am her only exposure to English. Her dad and half sister, who visits on the weekends, speak only Spanish. Her grandmother, who speaks only Spanish, takes care of her in the day. Everything is Spanish, except me.
I had no idea that I would have problems with language stuff. I thought it was like the movies and because I spoke to her she would naturally speak back to me in English.
I had a meltdown maybe a month ago when I realized how much her Spanish was progressing and her English not so much. I have made a bunch of changes like now allowing her to watch some types of videos when I am worn out from narrating everything we do, keeping her up later at night to have more time, getting my family to do short videos of the words we are working on, getting dad and sister to participate in English (it´s not that much, but every little bit helps), I am in the process of trying to make English-speaking friends here who want/need the same thing (I have met a couple of people and we have our first meetup soon). My mom is coming for three weeks and I will extend my visits to the US to have even more time, etc. Things have gotten better. She now has more words in English, she repeats me more often now. So I am a little better. Plus finding this site has been great. Knowing that this problem is common and giving me tools to deal with the situation. I am MUCH more aware of the work that is in front of me and I am totally up for it. The problem is...
How do I stop analyzing every interaction with her and that she has with others? I feel embarrassed to admit this, but I see myself getting angry with her grandmother and sister for interacting with her in Spanish. SOOOO WRONG. Plus, I don't enjoy my time with her as much as I could because I am obsessed with constantly talking and narrating everything. Gotta get my 30 hours and make 'em count!!!! This is a long term goal. I need to have patience, but I find it difficult.
Do others experience this or is it just me? How do you deal with these feelings?